Jokes
Category: Blind jokesHave
you seen stieve wonders house? -niether
did hemodify jokevote: 2.79
Category: Blind jokesA blind rabbit and a blind snake ran into each
other on the road one day. The snake reached out, touched the rabbit
and
said, "You're soft and fuzzy and have floppy ears. You must be
a
rabbit."
The rabbit reached out, touched the snake and
said, "You're slimy,
beady-eyed and low to the ground. You must be a
math teacher."modify jokevote: 1.99
Category: Blind jokesWhere do blind sparrows go for treatment ?
The Birds Eye counter !modify jokevote: 2.38
Category: Blind jokesQ:
How did a blind woman pierce her
ear?
A: Answering the stapler.modify jokevote: 9.96
Category: Blind jokesThere were those three guys, a
priest, a
doctor and an engineer, and they were playing golf. But the
group
before them was extremely slow and at each hole they waited hours.
Finally the priest asked around, why was that other group was so slow? He
was told that they were very courageous firemen who saved the golf
course a couple of years ago from a terrible fire, in which they all
lost
their sight. As a proof of appreciation they were given the
right to
play on the course whenever they wanted. They like that a
lot, but being
blind they are just not too good at hitting the ball,
let alone finding
it after it's hit.
The priest said, "Oh my
this is terrible. Tonight I'll say a little
prayer for these
courageous souls."
The doctor heard that and said "Don't worry. I'll send
them to a
friend of mine, he's an ophtalmologist and he works
wonders."
The engineer said "Wait. Why can't they just play at ni
ght?"modify jokevote: 9.15
Category: Blind jokesDid you hear about the blind porcupine?
He
fell in love with a pincushion!modify jokevote: 1.95
Category: Blind jokesTwo blind man at a cinema: "Can you see
something ?"
"No".
"Then let's go in front !"modify jokevote: 6.85
Category: Blind jokesA teacher at a
school for blind kids is
taking his school's soccer team to an "away
game". They stop for a
rest break, and to let the kids work off some energy
with a little
impromptu practice in a nearby pasture. The teacher is
sitting in a
nearby diner, explaining to another patron how it is that
blind kids
can play soccer.
"We made a special ball, with a bell in it, so
the kids can keep track
of where the ball is and what it's doing
by listening for it. They're
pretty good at it too."
"Very
clever!" remarks the other patron.
Just then they are
interrupted as another patron, who is looking out
the window, says, "Hey!
Are you the guy with those damn blind kids from
the bus?"
"Yes," says the teacher, stung by the way "his" kids are being
refered
to, "what about it? You got something against blind kids?"
"Nothing, ordinarily," says the guy, still scowling out the window,
r
"but you better get them rounded up quick! They're kicking the
hell
out of my best milk cow!"modify jokevote: 4.11
Category: Blind jokesA snake
and a rabbit were racing along a
pair of intersecting forest pathways
one day, when they collided at
the intersection. They immediately began
to argue with one another as
to who was at fault for the mishap.
When the snake remarked
that he had been blind since birth, and thus
should be given
additional leeway, the rabbit said that he, too, had been
blind since birth.
The two animals then forgot about the collision and
began
commiserating concerning the problems of being blind.
The snake said
that his greatest regret was the loss of his identity.
He had never
been able to see his reflection in the water, and for that
reason did
not know exactly what he looked like, or even what he was.
The
rabbit declared that he had the same problem. Seeing a way that they
could help each other, the rabbit proposed that one feel the other from
head to toe, and then try to describe what the other animal w
as.
The snake agreed, and started by winding himself around
the rabbit.
After a few moments, he announced, "You've got very
soft, fuzzy fur,
long ears, big rear feet, and a little fuzzy ball for
a tail. I think that
you must be a bunny rabbit!"
The
rabbit was much relieved to find his identity, and proceeded to
return
the favor to the snake. After feeling about the snake's body for a
few minutes, he asserted, "Well, you're scaly, you're slimy, you've
got beady little eyes, you squirm and slither all the time, and
you've
got a forked tongue. I think you're a lawyer!"modify jokevote: 4.57
Category: Blind jokesA blind man walks into a store with his seeing
eye dog. All of a sudden, he picks up the leash and begins swinging
the
dog over his head. The manager runs up to the man and asks,
"What are
you doing?!!" The blind man replies, "Just looking
around."modify jokevote: 9.57