Jokes
Category: Lawyer jokesWhy don't lawyers enjoy playing
golf?
Because it's too much like work, what with all of the lying
involved.modify jokevote: 9.69
Category: Lawyer jokesWhat do lawyers do after they die?
They lie
still.modify jokevote: 2.82
Category: Lawyer jokesLawyer: "Now that you have been acquitted,
will you tell me truly? Did you steal the car?"
Client: "After
hearing your amazing argument in court this morning,
I'm beginning
to think I didn't."modify jokevote: 1.47
Category: Lawyer jokesLawyer: "Let me
give you my honest
opinion."
Client: "No, no. I'm paying for professional advice."modify jokevote: 8.17
Category: Lawyer jokesHow many lawyers does it take to
change a
lightbulb?
None, they'd rather keep their clients in the dark.modify jokevote: 9.79
Category: Lawyer jokesHow can you tell a lawyer is lying?
Other
lawyers look interested.modify jokevote: 3.61
Category: Lawyer jokesYou're trapped in a room with a tiger,
a
rattlesnake and a lawyer. You have a gun with two bullets. What
should you do?
You shoot the lawyer. Twice.modify jokevote: 2.75
Category: Lawyer jokesWhy is it that New Jersey got all the toxic
waste dumps and California got all the lawyers?
New Jersey had
first choice.modify jokevote: 3.38
Category: Lawyer jokesWhy is
it that if you give a child an
encyclopedia, "lawyer" is always the
third thing they look
up?
Because the first thing a child looks up is "dog." The second is
"snake."
And under snake, the encyclopedia says "See Lawyer."modify jokevote: 4.72
Category: Lawyer jokesWhy is it dangerous for a lawyer to
walk
onto a construction site when plumbers are working?
Because they
might connect the drain line to the wrong suer.modify jokevote: 0.07