Jokes
Category: Marriage jokesWhen Mr. Maxwell's wife left him he
couldn't sleep.
"She took the bed!"modify jokevote: 9.92
Category: Marriage jokesMarriage is nature's way of preventing
people from fighting with strangers.modify jokevote: 5.60
Category: Marriage jokesTwo ladies were hanging out together and one
was depressed.
"What's wrong?"
The depressed one replied,
"I've been married four times and everyone
of my husbands has passed
away."
The other lady asked, "What did they used to do?"
The
depressed lady replied, "Well, my first husband was a millionaire,
the
second was a magician, the third was an evangelist, and the fourth
was a mortician."
And the other said, "Oh, one for the money, two for
the show, three to
get ready, and four to go."modify jokevote: 2.70
Category: Marriage jokesQUESTION: Do you know what
is honeymoon?
ANSWER: A short period of doting between dating and
debting.modify jokevote: 9.30
Category: Marriage jokesQUESTION: Why should a honeymoon only be six
days?
ANSWER: Because seven days makes a whole week.modify jokevote: 7.93
Category: Marriage jokesQUESTION: What is
honeymoon? ANSWER: That
brief span of time between, "I do" and
"You'd better!"modify jokevote: 6.80
Category: Marriage jokesMy wife sez that I'm too extravagant; that
if anything ever happens to her, I'll have to beg. I told her I'd
be
fine. I mean look at all the experience I've got.modify jokevote: 2.02
Category: Marriage jokesA woman decided to have her portrait painted.
She told the
artist, "Paint me with diamond earrings, a diamond
necklace, emerald
bracelets and a ruby pendant."
"But you are not
wearing any of those things."
"I know," she said. "It's in case I
should die before my husband.
I'm sure he will remarry right away,
and I want his new wife to go nuts
looking for the jewelry."modify jokevote: 4.43
Category: Marriage jokes"The thrill is gone from my marriage," Brian
told his best friend
Mike.
"Why not add some intrigue to your
life, and have an affair?" his
friend suggested.
"But what
if my wife finds out?"
"Heck, we are almost on the begining of
the 21st centrury, Brian. Go
ahead and tell her about it!"
So Brian went home and said, "Dear, I think an affair will bring us
closer together."
"Forget it," said his wife. "I've tried that
many times - it never
worked."modify jokevote: 0.05
Category: Marriage jokesWife, opening mail, to spouse: "The bank says
that this is our last
notice. Isn't it wonderful that they're not
going to bother us
anymore?'modify jokevote: 8.60